Tomorrow, I am presenting The Daily 5 and the science conference I recently attended to my fellow teaching staff. I can talk in front of kids all day, but throw me in front of some adults and I get weak-kneed. So, I am off to prepare. Maybe make a PowerPoint. Maybe write some note cards. Or a flow chart. One can never know with a nerd like me...
P.S. In other news, am I the last one to find out that Ashlee Simpson split with Pete Wentz? I'm not nearly as bummed as I was about Nick&Jessica. But, still surprised. Why do all (almost all) stars break up?
P.P.S. In other (more positive) news, Christopher and I will tie the knot in 51 days. I just learned that while the failure rate of marriage is 50% (or is it more now?), it is only 15% for couples who attend church together, and only 2% for couples who regularly pray together. That makes me feel wonderful. :o)
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I wonder how much pressure there is from religious families to not divorce? (obviously this is no comment about your own beliefs and relationship) but the statistics say that the divorce rate is lower but of course mentions nothing of how happy the couple is.
ReplyDeleteI'm not religious but I am confident my own marriage (when it eventually happens) will be just as successful.
I think now people give up to easily, at one point there was a stigma about being divorced so people would work harder at marriages. Now there is less stigma so people just seem to think "meh, I'll get a divorce and start again" obviously there are cases where people do try and it still fails, these things happen. It also strikes me that one thing I've seen with successful couples is the realisation that marriage does not mean happily ever after, they still need to work to maintain love and the spark that brought them together. I vaguely remember a saying about how love is like a garden, ignore it and it will whither, but water it and spend time working on it and it will bloom. It's something I have really taken to heart.
I wish you a happy marriage with my whole heart and I'm very much looking forward to seeing the pictures of your wedding day.
Oh Pam - what good points you've made! I've also thought about that before. I've wondered a lot about how in years past, divorce rates were so low. Was that due to couples really having a different mind set of not giving up and working at marriage together... or was it simply because of that bad stigma attached to divorce? And then there's the whole issue of how long ago, a woman couldn't have made it on her own. She was basically bound to her husband, even if he treated her poorly. Now, women can be independent. That has an effect on the failure rates of marriage... and is that even considered good (that a woman can get out of a bad marriage) or bad (that the rates have jumped)?
ReplyDeleteHonestly, I didn't even think about any of that when I heard the statistics. I was just thinking, "Yay, we do both (attend church and pray together!" :) I wonder if that's part of it - the pressure from families with religious backgrounds. For me personally, I like to think that the whole praying together and attending church thing are just forms of that commitment... to work through things and to communicate....with each other, as well as with God.
I totally agree with you - it's the commitment part that is the important part. It's the realization of marriage as not being "happily ever after" (not all the time at least). I really think people give up too easily; it's a sign of our times. "We" (people in general) can't even wait for a stove to heat up. We have to run through the fast food window because we're hungry now. If "we" are unhappy now in marriage, it's so easy to give up and run...or find someone else for the moment. I really think that's sad.
I love the saying you said about the garden. I hadn't heard that particular one before! Thanks so much for your comment. You've given me great stuff to think about! I loooove when people can have different beliefs and discuss them so positively. I am looking forward to hearing more about your wedding plans and your wedding! :)
I love the points that are being made above - neither my husband nor I is religious but we have been together for 10 years and married for 5. And we are happy. I'm not saying we don't have rough patches (frankly, I'd be worried if we didn't). But we are deeply committed to each other as best friends and partners in everything and that goes a long way to helping you work out any problems that may arise. I think the problem is that a lot of people in marriage expect to not have to work at it and be happy all the time and that's just not realistic. Anyways, I feel like I'm babbling so I'll stop and just say a big congrats on your upcoming wedding!
ReplyDeletexoxo ~ Courtney
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We have some kind of independence, we feel we're too strong to maintain yourself on our own and so on therefore sometimes we don't make an attempt to change something objectionable, to remove something undesirable and we just don't try to understand each others. We lose the skills of patience.
ReplyDeleteBut I'm sure It's not about you! Just be sure that everything will be alright.
And I don't know how to say it but I think that the statistic don't lie about the church. So I wish both of you a very happy life together!
love your cute outfit!
ReplyDeleteHappy St. Patrick's Day!
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